Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Drive By

Perhaps it's my quirky sense of humor, perhaps it was the exalted language, but with a vision of a naked man running down the halls of a government building in my head, I found the lawyer's closing comment funny.

***

I received a phone call last night from one of my best friends, a former paralegal secretary, who gave me a good link to the heads of Verizon as a means to resolve my insanity. We laughed, I ranted, she suggested I get over my hopeless problem, I cried, we recalled the good old days of working in a law office and feeling powerful. In the end, I realized I should just enjoy the benefits of a good screwing and move on with my internet life. Thank god I CAN post this entry, thank goodness I'm living in a 30-day timezone with no fees for the time being. Forget battling the big guy, I will lose.

We all do, really, because of the way we've been living.

The problem I've been going on about for weeks now is our fault. "We/our" being the suburbanites. We've been sleeping our days away and when we're not sleeping, we're on the hamster wheel, running our kids to school, chasing our paycheck, paying our bills, filling up our cars with gas, chit-chatting about Tom Cruise. Voting? We vote the way our parents did, we vote for the guy who has the most money, the most ads on television, the one who pushes our false issue buttons (gay marriage, abortion, blah, blah). We've been living in a Matrix that we helped create in order to give ourselves a pain-free life...and in the meantime, our support system, our employers, the computer that keeps up the Matrix, why, they've taken over.

And we let it happen by not paying attention.

So yeah, I'll let the screwing happen like so many others - lie back and enjoy the sweat, the heat, the darkness of the room, the calories being burned away, the shivering, reluctant orgasm of internet connection, or a full tank of gas, or a good show on the television. When I get up and get my clothes on, when the big guy saunters out of my bedroom, I'll realize I've been fucked by all the big guys...Arco, Verizon, the Government...and jesus...what woman doesn't want to get fucked by a big...guy?

***

By accident, I erased years of saved e-mail. With one swift click, I deleted years of friendship, constructive criticism, love, high-fives, births, deaths, information. For long minutes I searched the folders, finding nothing...gone, gone, all gone.

An empty mailbox stared back at me. Clean, full of promise. Full of forgetting.

8 comments:

Patrick O'Neil said...

and out of the ashes rose the phoenix…

Dale said...

Yikes. That's a lot to lose. You're making me realize I should somehow back up all that email (all of mine lives on google and yahoo servers... I wonder if they have an easy way of doing that? Probably not.) But half the information I need to live my life is in there -- I don't copy anything down, I just search for it in my mail. Hmm.

I dunno, you're making being fucked by the man a lot more fun than it sounded in the earlier modern life posts :-)

Edd said...

Aren’t we all disabled Americans these days? If I was to step upon my soapbox and burst forth in a cavernous bellow on the asinine antics and debacle we call “Verizon,” we would fester here for days! Actually, I have always wanted the exquisite design of a BIG man but nature heartbreakingly put a screeching stop to that desire. As for the lost files, many computer repair shops have forensic software available to help recover lost files – good luck.

Carolyn said...

LOL, that was funny about the prosecutor! We had a prosecutor here once, pretty young guy, that didn't go naked but every trial he ended up crying. He took every objection as a personal rejection. He didn't last long ;)

kazumi said...

Was thinking about something related to your last thought lately - will emails replace the love letters of years gone by?

I have secret email addresses with all those notes I want to keep, just in case I get nostalgic one day and wonder whether any of my children or grandchildren will come across them. Could they? I doubt it. It seems they're already forgotten.

David N. Scott said...

How's you delete your email? Are you sure it's really gone? I know it's pretty hard to delete your email in Windows/Outlook, anyway.

Powerul stuff here... I'll have to link it...

Adriana Bliss said...

David, the e-mail I deleted was from my writing.com account - webmail. I'd accidentally dumped the entire lot into my trash. I thought I had time to restore it. Sadly, the whole thing disappeared before I could transfer everything back to the inbox. Poof. Gone.

Wow...so many things to think about in the comments - I'm looking at a bicycle wheel, spokes shooting out. Thank you everyone for commenting. :) Always.

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